I Accidentally Joined My Crush's Gym Class and Now I Can't Leave

Let me set the scene.

There's this person at my gym. Gorgeous. The kind of gorgeous where you forget what exercise you're doing and just stand there holding a dumbbell like a confused tourist. We'll call them Spin Crush.

Spin Crush does the Thursday 6 PM spin class. I know this because I happened to notice. Once. Okay, three times. Fine, I adjusted my entire weekly schedule around it. WE'VE ALL BEEN THERE.

So one Thursday I think, "You know what? I should try spin. For my cardio. For health reasons. It has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that Spin Crush is in there."

I walk in. I clip into the bike wrong. I almost fall off during the warm-up. The instructor is yelling something about "finding your resistance" and I can't find the resistance knob because I'm too busy trying to look casual while Spin Crush is TWO BIKES AWAY.

That was six months ago.

I'm still going.

I HATE spin. I hate it with every fiber of my being. My knees hurt. The seat is a torture device. The music is too loud. The instructor keeps saying "YOU GOT THIS" and I decidedly do NOT got this.

But Spin Crush smiled at me once. ONCE. Three months in. They said "hey, can you pass me a towel?" and I said "YEAH ABSOLUTELY HERE YOU GO" like a golden retriever who just learned English.

I've since invested in spin shoes. I have a favorite bike (number 14, right side, optimal Spin Crush viewing angle). I bring a specific water bottle that I think makes me look put together.

I still haven't had a real conversation with them.

My friend asked me why I don't just talk to them and I panicked so hard I accidentally signed up for the Saturday class too.

So now I do spin TWICE a week. For a person who doesn't know my name. While my actual fitness goals (I wanted to get better at deadlifts) collect dust.

The worst part? I'm actually getting good at spin. My endurance is insane. My legs are shredded. I might be the fittest version of myself I've ever been, and it's entirely powered by delusion and unrequited attraction.

If you're reading this and you've ever rearranged your entire workout schedule around another human, just know: you're not alone. We are a community. A sweaty, lovesick, deeply unhinged community.

Related reading: Your Gym Crush Keeps Staring — What Does It Mean? — honestly I wish mine would stare. Even a glance. Anything.

And if you need actual advice on making a move instead of, you know, suffering in silence on a spin bike for half a year: How to Talk to a Girl at the Gym has some solid tips that I will read and absolutely not follow.

Update: they switched to the Tuesday class. I'm adjusting my schedule as we speak. Send help.